When I tell people we have an Aupair for our son Cashton, I get all kinds of reactions and questions.
Isn't that crazy expensive? Is it weird having someone else live in your home? How did you find her? And I think the most important question... Do you like being a host family? The honest to goodness answer is, "No, I love it!"
Having an Aupair has not only enriched our little guy's life by exposing him to different cultures and giving him stability in a caretaker, but it has also made our lives more manageable and helps our household run like clockwork. The stress I used to feel every day trying to schedule care for Cashton while I am at work and my husband Dallas is on the road for business is a thing of the past.
Although we have been extremely satisfied with our decision to become a Host Familly, it was not a commitment we took lightly. I spent months researching programs and following Aupair agencies on social media. One of the things I loved about Cultural Care was their "takeovers" on Instagram because it gave me a better understanding of what to expect as a host family and an insight as to what the experience should be from an Aupairs perspective.
I also spoke to other families who had hosted Aupairs before, to get an honest "read" on the situation. I asked so many questions like how to be successful in finding the right person and setting house rules. Luckily, my husband's boss had hosted Aupairs for years for their twin daughters and had lots of insight to give us, including their "house handbook." Which was a layout of where to find things in the house, what their family schedules and curfews were as well as emergency contacts, and how both parties should respect each other. This was especially helpful once our Aupair arrived.
As for the other questions my friends and family had, let's take these one by one. "Is it expensive"? I use to think Aupairs were for the super-wealthy but as it turns out, for us, it was pretty comparable to what we were paying for childcare with our nanny and we were getting a lot fewer hours. However, having someone who becomes a "big sister/ brother" figure to your child is invaluable. This person becomes someone who is caring for your child through your ethics, principles, and disciplinary beliefs.
"Is it weird having someone else live in your house?" I could see where a family would be concerned about this topic at first glance. Questions like, "will we ever have our own private family time again" could be a worrisome thought, but as the host family, you set the tone. Different families will be looking for different candidates. We happened to want someone who would become a part of our family and not a distant roommate. Other families might want an Aupair who is a little more independent who spends less time at home when they are off. That is why the interview process is so important and it is imperative for BOTH sides to be open and honest throughout the process.
Another question we get quite often is, "how did you find her?" After doing my research to find an Aupair agency that was right for our family, we decided on Cultural Care. In my opinion, they had the largest selection of countries to choose from when matching with Aupairs. With our Italian background, we knew we wanted Cashton to be exposed to our heritage and Italian language. You can also search by age demographic and gender. A family of all boys may want to have a male figure for their children, while others may feel age is important. We were looking for someone a little more mature for our first Aupair experience, but as lots of us parents know maturity doesn't always come with age so we were a little more open to speaking with Aupairs of all ages. We were, however, looking for someone who would fit into our family dynamic, who could keep up with our busy schedules and gave us "that" feeling. After all, this person is coming to live with you.
Which leads us to our last question. "Is it scary to invite someone into your home before ever meeting them in person?" Yes, but imagine how your Aupair feels. You are in the comfort of your own home. One constant is changing for you, everything is changing for them. Of course, you have to be confident in your match, but once they arrive the faster you can make them feel welcome and settled the stronger your bond can become. Think of it as your niece or nephew coming to stay with you for the first time. They will need to know, where the grocery store is and maybe how to use the washer and dryer. Little things that we take for granted and do every day might be a first for them.
Here is a look at our first week as a Host Family!
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